Here is a little tidbit everyone will enjoy from the Googily Gazette vault. Entitled "Memorial Waste Day" it has a classic Gang Green-Master P argument from that summer day when the lights were stripped from the Waterford Proven Grounds. Also somebody wins a $25 gift certificate to Applebees.
March is Master P month!
The Googily Gazette
May 29, 2008
Memorial Waste Day
Power supply to Thursday Night Hockey has been cut off, and what is left is three tangling black wires hanging high from a wooden telephone post. No more hockey until the problem is solved. Some are optimistic that the township is in the midst of fixing the electrical unit, but realists believe it is a grim end to an era of Thursday Night Hockey.
The Gazette has received a response by a Recreational Committee Member Miguel Arena
"I wasn't inform about the disposal of electrical power to Thursday Night Hockey, however I haven't been in contact or attended any recreational meetings since the beginning of April, so I'll have my secretary Brian Boytano make a few phone calls and will get a promising answer to the situation"
General Gang Green had an unusual reaction to the misfortunate news "Is somebody fu**in with us, I bet you it's the guy who lives across the street who did it, he must of climb up the 50 foot high telephone pole and cut those wires with his hedge clippers. Than he decided to wrap the entire electrical box with yellow caution tape to make it look like a professional job."
Master P diffused Gang Green's comments "What do you think a gorilla climb up the telephone pole and smash the wires with his clumsy paws. It obviously was done by a proper authority, why would anybody go to such drastic measures to disconnect the hockey lights."
Gang Green insisted on his outrageous conspiracy theory "Just because you're too lazy to skate out of your own defensive zone Master P doesn't mean somebody wouldn't mess with our lights. It doesn't make any sense that the town would build a 30,000 dollar hockey rink and decide all of sudden to shut down the lights. I'm telling you its that guy across the street, every time I turn into the park I see him giving me a dirty look, like I'm some kind of monster or something."
Master P unable to contain a straight face decided to chime in "Yeah I think that guy is apart of a terrorist sleeper cell. Our hockey lights are keeping him up all night so he can't assemble his dirty bomb.
"Yeah Master P he doesn't like Swedes, so he is going to use his dirty bomb to blow up your homeland. Gang Green remarked
"But why would he attack the Swedes? We our very friendly people" Master P explained
"Maybe because he doesn't like cheese or hot cocoa; and maybe his ex-wife left him for a guy who ate a lot of Swedish fish. Their are many reasons to not like a particular ethnic group, and if I had to live in country full of people like you Master P, I would have signed up to be a suicide bomber before you can say Swiss Miss." Gang Green replied.
"Well at least our people can play goalie, I haven't seen you make a save since the Johnson administration." Master P zinged.
"Master P you better watch out I'm going to give you a knuckle sandwich." Gang Green barked.
"What is this 1920s? Like I'm really afraid of you Gang Green, I've fu** with bigger nig*a* than you. Just because I look like Mats Sundin doesn't mean that I fight like him.' Master P yelped.
This tirade between Master P and Gang Green lasted longer, but due to time constraints was cut short. But a fax to the Googily Gazette editor's desk was sent by a Mr. Brian Boytano (aka M.J., Sméagol Van Gogh, Robocop, Mini Gang Green, The Sad French Clown, Case of Head Wax Gold Card Member, and The Worlds fastest skater) it read
"Mr. Matt Arena has informed me that he ran into the Recreation Committee President at the local tavern last night and receive the following information regarding our hockey lights, ah…….. That is right there is no new information about the hockey lights since Matt Arena was too intoxicated to converse. But he did manage to find out the next Recreation Meeting will be next Thursday June 5, 2008 at 730pm at the town hall in Waterford Township"
So its back to square one to once again rally together and fight for our beloved Thursday Night Hockey, we have to speak up again like the famous Quad "F Kennedy" Skates did that one historical winter night. We have no other choice but to fight in numbers and demand our lights to be turn back on. So if anybody wants to attend the meeting on Thursday June 5, at 7:30 please call me or send me an e-mail.
Oh and before I forget the Give Don a nickname contest winner is …… Don Key Kong that's right the General Gang Green has won the contest and now has to claim his $25 gift certificate to Applebees because it's eating good in the neighborhood. Congratulations from all of us from the Googily Gazette news desk.
"Always fight the good fight"
Peace,
The Chief Editor
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